It can be really hard trying to find that perfect someone. It doesn’t matter if you are a romantic wanting to find your soulmate or a realist wanting to find someone that will support you as much as you support them. Most people want to find someone that they can be secure about spending the rest of their lives together. Yes, there will always be ups and downs in any relationship, just as there are in life, but if you can find that special person with whom you can develop a really strong foundation, then those ups and downs become obstacles that you can work through together, not insurmountable mountains.
Although it has never really been as easy to find that perfect mate as the old school romance novels and movies might have you believe, in some ways those who were looking for love 40 or more years ago seem to have had an easier time of finding it. They would say that they weren’t as picky and that marriage was supposed to last forever in their day, however that’s not really true.
Yes, you may be picky, but people are getting into long term relationships at a later stage in their life, at a stage when they have already done so much growing and development. They aren’t running the risk of “growing apart” from their partner as many of the older generation did, the ‘millennial’ generation already knows who they are and what they are looking for in a life mate, the problem is that it’s not always easy to meet anyone, let alone someone with the same desires as. In life as you do.
Online Dating Is Not New
By the way it’s advertised you would be forgiving for thinking that online dating is something new, but everyone knows about this method of finding someone, and online dating has been around for over 25 years (and before that there were newspaper classifieds, and before that marriage brokers).
The real trick is to find dating sites at Dating Throne so you can work out which site is going to be best to help you find someone real. One of the biggest hurdles in the world of online dating isn’t actually finding the perfect match but knowing how you can use the dating sites to weed out the people you really don’t want to have anything to do with.
It’s not so hard when you’re in a large city, but if you’re in a small town there is a pretty good chance that you have probably already dated most of the suitable people that can be found on a dating site or hook-up ap in your area, so are you prepared to look further afield? Or are you willing to wait for a nice hometown girl to pop up and say hi?
Features To Look For
One of the most important features you can have on any dating site, beyond pictures even, is really good search filters. You need to be able to remove people you’ve already dated, people that are the wrong gender for your tastes, people that have the wrong sexual ordination, and probably the people that have the wrong political affiliation.
However, being able to write up a list of things that you do find attractive, and having those keywords bring potential matches to your search results is exactly what you do want. To get great search results you will usually need a site that is going to ask you to select certain interests when you sign up, so make sure that you are making yourself findable as well as finding the right people.
What Is Love?
Such a difficult question to answer, but it is pretty essential to work out if this is the person who you want to spend the rest of your life with. So, what does love mean to you?
Does it start with a physical attraction? Do you think that you would still feel love for someone as they aged or if they were disfigured? If you are honest with yourself and you doubt that you could see yourself as an 80 year old married and having sex with an 80 year old, then don’t go into a relationship telling the other person that you will be with them forever, it’s not fair on either of you.
The best relationships have more than an emotion to connect them, someone who you can respect and who also respects you – not just physically but someone with whom you can be interested in. This means actually being interested when you ask someone how their day was, and having them interested in knowing the little things you did – yes, most of the time our days are actually really boring and filled with the same mundane things, but being able to talk about your day to someone who actually cares about you can make those mundane events seem interesting, and if not, they can certainly make you feel interesting.
Do You Have Things In Common?
Believe it or not, you actually don’t have to always like the same things to have a happy and healthy marriage (see here). However, there are a few fundamentals that do make things easier. If either of you are big sporty people and the other isn’t, this isn’t a problem, as long as there is support in the relationship. This means that the non-sporty person will cheer on the sporty person, but the sporty person doesn’t berate or cajole the non-sporty person. If you are of different faiths, it is the same thing, as long as you are both able to support each other to have their beliefs and do not try to force the other person to believing what you do, there is no problem.
As you can see, a strong relationship is more about mutual respect and understanding than it is about having the same interests or passions. However, one thing to be clear on is how you would raise hypothetical children (although bear in mind that once children come along your ideas on everything may change, people are only perfect parents until they actually have kids) – start with what faith the children would be raised in, then move from there. Worst case scenario, it’s a really interesting fifth date topic.