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By eurobetch on

It has come to my attention that there is a bit of a discrepancy in the betch world that needs to be addressed. After coming back from Mexibetch with my besties we went out to show off our tans and get blackout (by having pros buy us drinks, obvi). We ran into a TTH who was trying to be cool and brag about her vacay to the beach. Now beaches are sacred to betches (is it a coincidence that the two sound alike?). They're the best place for tanning, napping, taking cute pics to make all the fat girls and wanna-betches jealous and meeting pros. Not to mention day drinking tequila at the bar only a few steps away and dressing like a slut. So when this TTH mentioned that this beach holiday was in fact at a lake, I had to like put down my vodka and take action. As any betch knows, lakes are gross. They're filled with eels, leeches and poor people. Like ew. They also happen to be infested with bros who take 3 days off their minimum wage jobs to rent a shitty boat and drink cheap beer. We've all seen this. These are the bros who will post an entire fb album of 500 pics of them and their friends on the "beach" aka that dirty waterhole an hour away from the city that betches have a cute condescending nickname for like "Redneck Riviera". Now these 2 very different vacation spots are not to be confused, unfortunately modern vernacular restricts us both to use the term "beach". Gross. This is why I propose lake beaches be hereafter referred to as "broches". Why? Because brooches are fugly and gross, as are broches. The term "broch" also emphasizes the prevalence of bros in this area, warning fellow betches to keep their distance. Meanwhile, betches retain use of the word "beach". Fucking duh. 

8 Comments TALK SHIT!
  1. no. says:

    The only good part of this was the last two sentences.

    Posted on Reply
  2. Hillary says:

    You just sound highly annoying. Why you give a shit about this girl for enjoying an old fashioned lake house getaway is beyond me. True, a lake isn’t a fucking beach, but stop trying to make “broches” work. Ew.

    Posted on Reply
  3. Emilayday says:

    Shut up. I’m ashamed for having read this.

    Posted on Reply
  4. Emilayday says:

    Besides, are you going to tell me that Lake Cuomo is worse than the beaches at Jersey Shore? Hello?? George Clooney vs The Situation.  Get your facts straight.

    Posted on Reply
  5. betchybetch says:

    Emilayday do you have anything better to do than comment on everything? someone has a lot of free time to lurk the internet…sounds like a fat betch to me

    Posted on Reply
    • so says:

      clearly you have the same amount of time because you read all the posts emilayday has commented on, and you read all her comments, or at least you saw her name.  It takes all of 30 seconds to comment on a post.  so wow, based on all your evidence you can show that this girl has all of idk, maybe maximum 5 minutes of free time.  that is definitely solid proof she must be a “fat betch”!  seriously how stupid can you be

      Posted on Reply
  6. Emilayday says:

    It’s called the flu betch. But how sweet of you to stalk my comments.

    Posted on Reply
  7. Your Name says:

    Bit off here tbh…  The brooch is definitely coming back, along with every other inane 90’s trend.  Beware and prepare betches!

    Posted on Reply
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