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By The Betches on

Betch: noun. \ˈbech\

A betch is the one who has everything figured out. Everything she (or sometimes he, we're looking at you Gay BFFs) associates with is trendy, every guy she interacts with wants to date her and every girl she meets is desperate to be her friend. She speaks her mind and commands a room just by being in it. She’s never waited on line at a club or bar in her life. She wears the best clothes and can pull off risqué, cool outfits with ease and without looking like a whore, or Lady Gaga. Her life is like an episode of The Hills, always involving some sort of drama with her friends or a guy that everyone wants to know about, even if they barely know her.

If you could combine the hotness of Kate Moss with the wit of Chelsea Handler, and the fuck-off vibe of Anna Wintour, you would have yourself the ultimate betch.

A betch is often confused with a bitch but make no mistake, they're different. A betch isn't just mean for no reason like a bitch is. She's edgy. Kind of like how poor people have ugly clothes, but you can also be rich and have ugly clothes, bitches are not automatically betches. A betch is quick and she owns whatever situation she's in. She always gets what she wants; be it guys, school, friendships, or a career. Betchiness about gaining success in a man’s world while still being hot and fun and envied. We’re the girls born with the silver spoon in our mouths. But like, fuck silver, we want gold.

The Betch Movement

This website isn’t self-help. Self-help is for fat people and divorcees. This site is the betchy girl’s bible, reaffirming her beliefs about herself and the universe, and guiding her through situations a betch might encounter; such as, what to do if you find yourself being drawn to act like a nice girl, what do you do when your pot dealer doesn’t answer, and is it okay to give head on the first date? This is where you go to deal with your problems when you have no problems.

Betchiness comes from the inside, unlike beauty.



179 Comments TALK SHIT!
  1. The Betches says:

    everyone is aware this is SATIRE, yes? no need to get offended, this site both pokes fun at & celebrates “betches”.

    Posted on Reply
  2. The Betches says:

    Hey betch, let me tell you something, ur site sucks, this site is shit as knock off of some sun-setting bro site. get real, yeah right

    Posted on Reply
  3. The Betches says:

    Alex- you’re going to talk shit to a website that talks shit? get real girlfrand and fuck off.

    Posted on Reply
  4. The Betches says:

    THIS SITE IS FUCKING AWESOME. I could not describe a betch better, it is in my vocabulary everyday. BETCH is the best word known to man so fuck all the haterz.
    - Bethany the #1 Betch

    Posted on Reply
  5. The Betches says:

    this comment doesnt make any sense and is stupid.

    Posted on Reply
  6. The Betches says:

    Don’t talk shit about the site just because no betch will ever want to have sex with you. Instead you should get off your computer and go shave your back. That shit needs work.

    Posted on Reply
  7. The Betches says:

    yeah go moderate my comment, shit ass site moderator

    Posted on Reply
  8. The Betches says:

    stopp alex. this site isnt bad. my friend recommended me read it today. its pretty funny. its just that bros site is more vulgar, making it funnier/better. im sure the writer has more coming. i havent read everything so you may have mentioned these, but food for thought- talk more abt how betches love to ABUSEEE guys, benefits of solo sex, perk of being a girl, ect. make it juicy, betches lives are prettty juicy

    Posted on Reply
  9. The Betches says:

    alex u are obvii not a betch

    Posted on Reply
  10. The Betches says:

    hahahah Ames, your comment was awesome. she obvi is not a betch

    Posted on Reply
  11. The Betches says:

    From one betch to another, I have you call you out because:

    a) The couches you mention are so bourgeois, real betches only use chairs
    b) The real quote is “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”

    Other than that, this site is totes authentic. SML for this site.
    TC betches, and keep it up <3

    Posted on Reply
  12. The Betches says:

    Betches slap bitches who say totes

    Posted on Reply
  13. The Betches says:

    False, betch. Totes is obviously acceptable due to it’s usage in “I Love You, Man” (Paul Rudd! Awww, love him!) which makes it relevant in pop culture. Duh.

    Posted on Reply
  14. The Betches says:

    THANK YOU. I like you already Catarina!

    Posted on Reply
  15. The Betches says:

    honestly, this is the best website i’ve ever been to. everything is so true and i can 100% relate. hilarious & good shit. keep it coming.

    Posted on Reply
  16. The Betches says:

    so basically, you guys are fuckin slam pieces that get your fuckin panties wet from bros? its like a bro fan club. its obvious that slam pieces love bros, but you guys are actually admitting it? props to you.

    Posted on Reply
  17. The Betches says:

    “Men may control the world, but the women control the men.”

    Posted on Reply
  18. The Betches says:

    You do realise that men know about this and allow it to happen…so in reality, men control the world and let women think they control the men

    Posted on Reply
  19. The Betches says:

    I think Alex is upset he got played by a betch last night.

    Posted on Reply
  20. The Betches says:

    loveeee this blog! post more asap can’t wait xo

    Posted on Reply
  21. The Betches says:

    You suck dick you’re a fucking sperm donor so obviously you have a lot of jizz laying around (in your mouth). Clearly not a betch. Don’t hate, just don’t read.

    Posted on Reply
  22. The Betches says:

    This is the best fucking site in the world. I don’t care if it’s a spin off of … it’s fucking BETTER! I’m a betch and I appreciate everything this site has to say. I don’t even live off my daddy’s money but I can sure as hell say that I depend on him for a lot of shit. Cheers to my fellow betches, stay betchy.

    Posted on Reply
  23. The Betches says:

    Seton, I feel the same way!

    Posted on Reply
  24. The Betches says:

    This site is fucking retarded and gay-ish.

    Posted on Reply
  25. The Betches says:

    your gay-ish…#leavethissiteandnevercomeback

    Posted on Reply
  26. The Betches says:

    I really hope you mention how bitches love leopard print. I have a working theory that at the moment states “If a girl owns three or more items of leopard print, she is a bitch. As the number rises so does the bitch factor.”

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  27. The Betches says:

    Leopard? I want to throw up. but maybe your right, “bitches” love leopard. However, “BETCHES” do not. leopard is for poor people and unless your talking about something other than the taxidermy leopard rug in my walk in closet, like clothes or shoes, you clearly are not a betch. well anyway, since ur into that sort of shit, just keep one rule in mind: dont wear animal prints if your bigger than the animal. xo.

    Posted on Reply
  28. The Betches says:

    Alex you’re too fucking poor and stupid to know a real fucking betch-site. Go back to the hole you crawled out of and stop murking up our water. DONE BETCH.

    Posted on Reply
  29. The Betches says:

    this website made my life complete<3 GET HIGH!

    Posted on Reply
  30. The Betches says:

    This site is HILARIOUS cause its SO true. Everyone that hates on it needs to chill the fuck out, no one is making you read it

    Posted on Reply
  31. The Betches says:

    Best site ever, love my betches. Also, Alex please fuck off just because a betch laughed at you after you dropped your pants doesn’t give your the right to shit on the site that explains to you why an inchworm isn’t hot to a betch.

    Posted on Reply
  32. The Betches says:

    Omg I laughed out loud at he Alex comment. Too fucking true.

    Posted on Reply
  33. The Betches says:

    Apparently Betches are incapable of spelling as well. Cheers!

    Posted on Reply
  34. The Betches says:

    This is why girls truely suck… They try to jump on every great idea men come up with but fall short. For instance they play basketball but with smaller balls, golf but closer to the tee, baseball but thrown underhand with bigger balls, soccer with smaller ball… lets just face it there are only a certain amount of things girls can be good at aka sex , cooking and cleaning… And for the record… no such thing as a betch… its a cunt and every girl who participates in this site immediatley becomes one

    Posted on Reply
  35. The Betches says:

    first of all “woman shouldnt vote” a bro would not even care enough to comment on this site, so stop acting like you are one. let the betches play and stop ruining everyones fun. you sound like white trash and generally like a huge asshole.

    Posted on Reply
  36. The Betches says:

    “Woman shouldnt vote” first of all learn proper english. It’s women not woman. You obviously didn’t make it past high school/college. Second, a bro wouldn’t give two shits about what betches talk about because he’s not one. Third and finally, you’re obviously ugly and alone which therefore explains why you took the time to embarrass yourself. “kthanks, you can go shave your back now.”

    Posted on Reply
  37. The Betches says:

    I play from the mens tees, and I guarantee I am one of the biggest betches you will ever meet. Bros only exist because of betches, and you clearly aren’t a bro. Maybe you should stop being jealous that your golf balls are bigger than your own balls.

    Posted on Reply
  38. The Betches says:

    golf balls are pretty big

    Posted on Reply
  39. The Betches says:

    You’re just a sad excuse for a male. You can’t handle woman who can own it better than you can, confidence scares the crap out of you quicker than the jar of creamed spinach your mommy fed you last night and you know damn well WITHOUT her you would be more worthless than you are, and if you dont have a mommy well shit, no wonder why you’re so screwed. Now be the filthy cave man you are so good at being and climb back into your cave and stop your grunting.

    Posted on Reply
  40. The Betches says:

    girls and guys use the same size soccer balls…

    Posted on Reply
  41. The Betches says:

    Wow… great job shit talking but your forgetting one thing… You are still females aka less than males in society… I undertstand your frustration it sucks always being number 2

    Posted on Reply
  42. The Betches says:

    superiority complex much?

    Posted on Reply
  43. The Betches says:

    @women shouldn’t vote: your grammar is atrocious, you have the mentality of a caveman, and you probably look like one, too. It must suck to have to smack girls on the head with a club to get them to fuck you, no wonder your self-esteem is so low

    Posted on Reply
  44. The Betches says:

    “Women shouldn’t vote” sorry your mom’s didn’t love you. Maybe it’s because she was too big of a betch to love such an ugly child. Good luck with your sad little life.

    Posted on Reply
  45. The Betches says:

    Bros have every right to comment on any website they’d like, including I thought this sit would include recipes and laundry secrets but its just a horrible attempt for women to feel like theyre in control of a bro. As mentioned, this website is simply a poor excuse for what a bro has already thought of. So unless you’re screwing, cooking or cleaning, remember, you’re wasting your time because bros don’t really dont care about anything else you do.

    Posted on Reply
  46. The Betches says:

    You obviously have a small dick. Sorry I’m not sorry!

    Posted on Reply
  47. The Betches says:

    So.. in your free time you came on this site looking for laundry secrets and recipes? I guess that makes you the bitch.. oops cunt*

    Posted on Reply
  48. The Betches says:

    Women still shouldn`t vote: You`re a close-minded backwards little fuck if you think anyone could actually take your dumb fucking point of view seriously. Like, “women still shouldn`t vote?” What the fuck is wrong with you? What fucking 18th century hick village are you from? You`re ridiculous. PS, I love betches.

    Posted on Reply
  49. The Betches says:

    LMFAO at both of you whiney boy wanna-bee betches claiming you’re “bro’s”. You’re not bro’s and you will never amount to a betch, the only point you both have managed to get across is that you both are just little bitches now going to be known as (#6 Nicknames) “Baby Dick 1 & 2″. <3 all the bitches who turned you down/laughed <3

    Posted on Reply
  50. The Betches says:

    LMFAO at the idea you’d think that any of us ‘wanna-be bro’s’ would ever want to be a betch. Any self-respecting man would laugh at your having of a vagina. Funny thing is, all you betches just want to be bros, but your shit ain’t cash enough, and your sandwiches aren’t good enough to merit anything other than a righteous cockslap right up side your fucking head.

    Posted on Reply
  51. The Betches says:

    chilllll ouuttt bro. do you not realize that to be a bro you can’t show that you care so much about shit like this? being a bro is all about giving a fuck, but looking like you don’t give too much of a fuck (and you clearly have shown here that you give a whole sack of angry fucks). so by the power of the broletariate i hereby revoke your membroship until you can calm the fuck down. you’ll be in the penalty brox until further-notice-o-clock for numerous violations of bro code standard “chill and let chill.”

    you are also sentenced to read since it is the ultimate authority on this matter

    Posted on Reply
  52. The Betches says:

    also bro — misogyny is so not chill.

    Posted on Reply
  53. The Betches says:

    Brosephian, you are marvellous.

    Also, just a quiet point to make to the little boys out there saying that women are just good for “screwing and cooking and cleaning” – I’m good at all of those things. I’m also a business owner at nineteen. So, yes, women suck good dick and make great cupcakes. Shame you aren’t getting any of either with that attitude.

    Peace out, betches.


    Posted on Reply
  54. The Betches says:

    So, real men laugh at women for having vaginas?

    Posted on Reply
  55. The Betches says:

    Betch: someone who overthinks and subsequently fakes 90% of all social interactions. Bros keep it real.

    Posted on Reply
  56. The Betches says:

    If you don’t know what a betch is, you aren’t one. If you think you’re a betch, you soo aren’t a betch. You are born a betch, you don’t have to be told.

    Posted on Reply
  57. The Betches says:

    Damn. You betches gotta chill

    Posted on Reply
  58. The Betches says:

    all this website is about is pseudo-empowerment. don’t fool yourselves.

    Posted on Reply
  59. The Betches says:

    wow Jaki! you really have a way with words!! NOTTTT. When’s the last time you had your dick in another girl’s vagina? Was it when your mother gave birth to you? You, and all other men who hate on this site have what we like to call, MOMMY ISSUES. Definition of Mommy Issues- a guy who has a poor relationship with his mother therefor exhibits anger and/or complex emotions towards women. We are not your mothers! WE’RE BETCHES. For all of you men out there who find the need to tell betches that they aren’t “empowering themselves” and that they arn’t winning, you also display sings that you are a classic insecure, ignorant BULLY. If you truey won the ” I pyschologically fucked you over game” why talk about it?? Do you know what I call a guy that bullys a girl? A PUSSY

    Posted on Reply
  60. The Betches says:

    As a Queen Betch,
    I am absolutely proud of this site. I am already addicted to it. Keep up the good gossip.


    Posted on Reply
  61. The Betches says:

    this site is amazing if you don’t like it you are probably a pathetic loser

    Posted on Reply
  62. The Betches says:

    This site is fuckinnggg awesome.

    Posted on Reply
  63. The Betches says:

    Only nobody, ugly, jealous losers hate betches. Sorry that you’re not one of us. Actually….not really. Love the site betches!

    Posted on Reply
  64. The Betches says:

    Hahaha, you all seem to be mistaken, ‘betch’ does not mean ‘fucking retarded’. Look for the betches among society, do you know where they are? On a pole at *Girls! Girls! Girls!* down by the airport. Don’t feel so fucking full of yourselves, you’re just the next college drop-out to give her ex-boyfriend crack addict head, and that’ll be your only use until you learn to make a proper sandwich.

    Posted on Reply
  65. The Betches says:

    At least we’re not your fugly girlfrind, sitting next to you, watching you visit a a chick site with pink wallpaper, bashing betches AND NOT GETTING FUCKED. p.s betches don’t eat sandwhiches, and they certainly don’t give them to bros either. We buy paninis becasue we go green. ASSHOLE.

    Posted on Reply
  66. The Betches says:

    I think Paige is giving you a little too much credit, we all know you don’t have a girlfriend. && no the fugly girl you managed to roofie two weeks ago doesn’t count either. Also the girls who you consider ‘betches’ are what we call strippers not betches- although I can’t say I’m surprised that the only hot girls you get to see are the ones you pay to see at the strip club. Maybe you should be hitting the gym or calling your local plastic surgeon instead of reading this site and understanding why no betch wants your tiny 4 inch dick.

    Posted on Reply
  67. The Betches says:

    Marvin Gaye really was the king wasn’t he!… a thank you to the site author for reminding me to crate dig through some slow jams…

    Posted on Reply
  68. The Betches says:

    We def need a betchy photos section. Just sayin’.

    Posted on Reply
  69. The Betches says:

    Dear Betch,
    I have all the requisites of a betch, I’m good looking, have a trust fund and have people who adore me, but for the longest time I’ve been acting like the good girl, being too nice, on the expense of myself at times. This website have helped draw out the betch in me, and let me tell you, my life has honestly gotten better. I’ve been #winning more, #fake smilling more and been more of a betch to people who don’t deserve my awesomeness. So, thank you thank you Betch.

    Posted on Reply
  70. The Betches says:

    How about you sluts actually go and try to get laid, after you make my sandwich, instead of acting like you can. You cyber sluts need to do exactly what my fellow bros have already said, stop voting of course, get back into the kitchen, and get on your knees and open wide for daily calcium intake.

    Posted on Reply
  71. The Betches says:

    FSU bro, you obviously weren’t raised with a housekeeper growing up, because you’d know that any Betch would sooner know how to deliver a baby than clean a floor. This is probably one of the reasons why this site upsets you so much. You simply cannot relate to, or date a betch, and obviously monetarily accommodate one either. I can guarantee you that HAVE NEVER been appreciated by one as well. If you did, I wouldn’t be surprised if she was 20 shots deep with a xanax in her. I also wouldn’t be surprised if she set her poonani on fire when waves of sobriety began kicking in. p.s sorry that your mother licked your floors but I will for the second time, state on that ,we are not you’re mothers, we’re betches. The only thing we have in common with them is that we would rather never see you naked.

    Posted on Reply
  72. The Betches says:

    FYI semen is composed almost entirely of protein, not calcium. so unless your prematurely ejaculating milk out of your tiny dick, check your facts. fucking duh.

    Posted on Reply
  73. The Betches says:

    ohh you mean get on the floor to give a blow job, not clean. Got it. Housekeepers cook for you too. As per our daily calcium intake, that was already taken during our lucky sperm doners lunch break, in his steam room while his housekeeper, or future wife was making our sandwhiches.

    Posted on Reply
  74. The Betches says:

    ohh you mean get on the floor to give a blow job, not clean. Got it. Housekeepers cook for you too. As per our daily calcium intake, that was already taken during our lucky sperm doners lunch break, in his steam room while his housekeeer, or your future wife was making our sandwhiches.

    Posted on Reply
  75. The Betches says:

    your future wife. Sorry.

    Posted on Reply
  76. The Betches says:

    Uh what’s with the hate on Asians? There are some Asian betches in the world too..

    Posted on Reply
  77. The Betches says:

    This site is fucking hilarious. Bravo.

    Posted on Reply
  78. The Betches says:

    this site is so fetch and the advice you give is great. keep it up betches

    Posted on Reply
  79. The Betches says:

    if you hate this site leave, you’re clearly not a betch

    Posted on Reply
  80. The Betches says:

    “Legal: All content on Betches Love This Site is intended for entertainment purposes only. It is neither meant to be interpreted as the truth, nor based in reality.”

    The site is literally a joke, it’s funny for sure but stop taking it so seriously.

    Posted on Reply
  81. The Betches says:

    I read these posts like it’s the bible… looove the betchiness!

    Posted on Reply
  82. The Betches says:

    LOL Russians won the Cold War.

    Posted on Reply
  83. The Betches says:

    betches just became my #1 form of entertainment at work..keep it comin

    Posted on Reply
  84. The Betches says:

    Best damn blog I ever read. Betch be proud.

    Posted on Reply
  85. The Betches says:

    This is so perfect in so many ways.

    Posted on Reply
  86. The Betches says:

    this site is so funny, basically says what every pretty girls has been thinking her whole life. except for “if a bro had a vagina he’d be a betch”. i sure as hell dont think any bro ive ever met would get so excited over any soap-type tv show and watch it with all his bros. bros and betches work perfectly together but are not even close to the same.

    Posted on Reply
  87. The Betches says:

    Im new on wordpress.. just for some homework and this is the first blog i see… anyway i wanna be a betch!

    Posted on Reply
  88. The Betches says:

    men are just threatened by us betches. stand proud ladies.

    Posted on Reply
  89. The Betches says:

    love this sight, its so true and so funny! its like you’ve written down exactly what i think! one quick question- how come you know so much about betches? are you one?;)

    Posted on Reply
  90. The Betches says:

    I liked this site a lot better before you replaced “Bro” with “Betch” for every single post and renamed the website. Stop stealing from NYB and Bros Like This Site.

    Posted on Reply
  91. The Betches says:

    Hahaha….u betches are hillarious!

    Posted on Reply
  92. The Betches says:

    And how can I became a BETCH?

    Posted on Reply
  93. The Betches says:

    i do love it when betches unite.

    Posted on Reply
  94. The Betches says:

    I’m not sure if I love you or hate you.. Perhaps this epitomizes what being a betch is all about?

    Posted on Reply
  95. The Betches says:

    Wow. I can honestly say that this site lacks any sort of sophisticated humor, wit, intelligence, or any other redeeming quality. Not only are you guys trying too hard, you sound like a bunch of idiots. You make me embarrassed to identify as a wealthy, educated, and good looking female. Congratulations on trying, but failing. Go ahead and respond, rest assure that I don’t care enough to check back to see your ‘betchy’ response. Pathetic.

    Posted on Reply
  96. The Betches says:

    Get real, Mary. You’re totally going to be bored and think that the head betches will write you back, but you are wrong. They wont waste time on you. You’re probably not wealthy, educated, OR good looking, let’s be real here.

    Posted on Reply
  97. The Betches says:

    Love the site, betches.

    Posted on Reply
  98. The Betches says:

    The best part is that this site is written by guys. That’s obvious right? I mean, true betches would never be so self-aware, and even if they were, they could never be bothered to write about it. It would take away from betch time.

    Betch up.

    Posted on Reply
  99. The Betches says:

    this is effing amazing!!!!!

    Posted on Reply
  100. The Betches says:

    mary wolff isnt worthy enough to havethe title “betch”.

    Posted on Reply
  101. The Betches says:

    This site is betchin’ <3
    Haterz can stop being jealoussss

    Posted on Reply
  102. The Betches says:

    you guys should do a post on the sorority squat!

    Posted on Reply
  103. The Betches says:

    I love love love this site! You are todally going on my blogroll! Keep up the betch work!

    Posted on Reply
  104. The Betches says:

    This site is classless. I have seen male equivalent sites, just as pathetic. You “betchees” keep thinking you know how the game is played. It’s not going to get you anywhere.

    Posted on Reply
  105. The Betches says:

    Love this!! I am def a Betch!!

    Posted on Reply
  106. The Betches says:

    love your blog
    french betches love you!

    Posted on Reply
  107. The Betches says:

    Post about PRE breakup betches– being a betch in a not long distance relationship needs a post! ps Pippa Middleton= betch of the week. her #pro boyfriend is sexy

    Posted on Reply
  108. The Betches says:

    Okay, Be.tch I’m going to check you out. A lot.

    Posted on Reply
  109. The Betches says:

    this site is extremely sexist, a bad imitation of broslikethissite, not remotely funny and unfortunately makes women look very desperate.

    Posted on Reply
  110. The Betches says:

    I love betches on my level. I would give you guys two thumbs up but my manicurist would get fussy, so I’ll let my BBB do it on my behalf.

    Posted on Reply
  111. The Betches says:

    to all of you haters out there,
    if u don’t like this site, get off it!

    we don’t need people like you to like people like us.

    queen betch

    Posted on Reply
  112. The Betches says:

    I’m a betch in train’n. love your site!!

    Posted on Reply
  113. The Betches says:

    love this stuff…betches unite

    Posted on Reply
  114. The Betches says:

    this blog is my new obsessh… LOVE it
    The queen betch

    Posted on Reply
  115. The Betches says:

    This is freaking awesome.

    Posted on Reply
  116. Pros Only Betch says:

    Alex - how many times a day do you check this site? Pretty sure you’ve commented on this post more than anyone else.  I’m embarrassed for you that you care so much.  You seem extremely desperate for any sort of attention—perhaps would better satisfy that need?

    Posted on Reply
  117. Alyssa says:

    This site pretty much has nailed it on every subject. Girls, dont take it too seriously though.. if you walk around saying these things in public your going to get hit.

    and if your a guy on this site.. taking the time to comment… you are obviously 1. gay and 2. have absolutely no life. So do us all a favor and gtfo.

    Posted on Reply
  118. Kirsten betchesssss says:

    hey BETCHEZZZZZ it’s me! how about we all stop gettin into little betch fights and all be bessssssst betches?!

    Posted on Reply
  119. Da Betch says:

    THANK YOU. I love you already Alexandra.

    Posted on Reply
  120. Anonymous says:

    I have spent my fucking life trying to explain that! YES!

    Posted on Reply
  121. Anonymous says:

    The Kardashians are obvi the only betches who could pull off leopard. Get your shit together, or gtfo.

    Posted on Reply
  122. Wait What? says:

    So a betch is fierce awesome independent except for the lack of job, career, and personal income. GOT IT.

    And women wonder why they get called gold-digging hoes.
    Try taking up a real cause “ladies”

    Posted on Reply
  123. Jenna says:

    Why must people waste their time commenting on things that are ‘shit’? Keep your comments to yourselves people, you just look pathetic posting your hatred on a site where NO ONE CARES. c’mon, get real…betches don’t give a fuck about your opinions about them anyways. smile

    Posted on Reply
  124. Cbiggs says:

    I thought this site was going to be entertaining, but after reading a few posts and this description, it makes me sad. Your definition of “being cool” translates to only speaking in sarcasm, having no feelings, wanting to be like a man (“If a bro had a vagina he’d be a betch”), and not having any real girlfriends to call your own. I am so glad I’m not cool by your standards. I’m happy to own any situation I’m in, but I also FEEL things other than shame, low self-esteem, and the need to try (way) too hard.
    I really hope that all of your readers gain some self-confidence of their own and stop getting off on putting “fatties,” “uglies,” and (basically ALL) men down. Good luck to you in your search for self worth. You’re certainly not going to find it here.

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  125. kayleaa says:

    loooove this siteee
    makes me laughhh!
    and makes me tone out my university class i am currently sitting in .. “yawn”

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  126. truballer233 says:

    BETCH is the best word known to man so fuck all the haterz. Instead you should get off your computer and go shave your back. my friend recommended me read it today. im sure the writer has more coming. As the number rises so does the bitch factor. Go back to the hole you crawled out of and stop murking up our water. let the betches play and stop ruining everyones fun. you sound like white trash and generally like a huge asshole. Maybe you should stop being jealous that your golf balls are bigger than your own balls. Now be the filthy cave man you are so good at being and climb back into your cave and stop your grunting.thanks vigrx plus

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  127. truballer233 says:

    Stop stealing from NYB and Bros Like This Site. It would take away from betch time. if you walk around saying these things in public your going to get hit. Good luck to you in your search for self worth.thanks vigrx

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  128. jake says:


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  129. hello says:

    This is SAD

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  130. trish says:

    I used to really like your site. Things seemed to have changed, but as a disclaimer, at least your “About” section reflects that. From what I can remember, being a betch used to be more about doing whatever you want because being an independent woman who doesn’t give a flying fuck was what was up. It was really empowering! Now, this site makes me think a “betch” is just code for “super bitch.” The writing seems to have changed. It used to be witty and satirical. Now, I think the satire is lost and you actually encourage young women to practice what you preach . Also, using fuck in every other sentence doesn’t make you edgy or cool; it makes you sound like either a) You have no vocabulary or b) You’re trying too hard to be cool.

    Just a thought. I miss the old betch(es).

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  131. megs says:

    hah your comment is ridiculous and for all the things you listed stating why girls don’t compare to guys is false..for one if you ever played soccer you would know that in a real game playing with a smaller soccer ball is more difficult

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  132. i wasnt gonna....... says:

    ...ever throw in my 2 cents; i like to read and I am highly amused by the fact that apparently people exit that can relate to how i think, HOWEVER, i just like reading what others think, dont need to share my rude thoughts.  i saw this pompous comment and just felt compelled to let you know that, women and men use the same size soccer ball, fool.

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  133. Bro says:

    I met betch last night. She’s a pretty cool betch.

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  134. Sara says:

    BEST WEBSITE! Keeps me so entertained and laughing ! For all the haters they’re just jealous because they could never be a real betch. Don’t like the site? Leave it and go sit in the corner playing video games. Stop hating this is a great website. KEEP UP THE WORK BETCH!

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  135. Claude Brodesser-Akner says:

    Have you betches ever cracked the spine of a book?

    Louis XIV wasn’t overthrown or beheaded; he died at age 77 (of gangrene) and successfully passed the French throne to his great-grandson, who himself then ruled for another fifty-eight years.

    The Buddha never taught “self-actualization” - in fact, he taught the total opposite, saying “Where the self is, truth is not. And where the truth is, the self is not.”

    If you think the “age of annoying rebellions” is over, why don’t you ask Muammar Gadaffi, Hosni Mubarak, or Bashar al Assad how things are going in the let-them-eat-cake dept.?


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  136. Stew Pid Betches says:

    what useless sperm receptacle created this website?

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  137. Stew Pid Betches says:

    i believe the dumb slut that wrote this meant it…she a sorority girl obviously…and they all think like this…sorry sweetie…youre probably a bro ho too.

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  138. meowBETCH says:

    I FUCKIN LOVE THIS SITE!!!.....cant say more then Facebook…but definitley more then Twitter! Every non-Betchy Betch NEEDS TO READ up and learn to LOVE this site. (we all know you are living vicariously through it anyway) LISTEN AND LEARN Especially if you want to be something in this World…. like a famous rich sexy BETCH with your dream bro.

    “Don’t expect a drama free life BETCHES. Haters (all the non-betches) are just mad because you’re doing better than them…at everything.” -meowBETCH

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  139. arab betch says:

    whoever you are - your genius for putting such an entertaining blog together!

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  140. Anonymous says:

    Yes, this is definitely satirical! That is exactly what I was thinking. The site is true to betches… but it makes fun of their idiosyncrasies more so than anything else. We need to take this with a grain of salt. The writers may be partial betches… but a true betch wouldn’t take the time to write this much (and generally write very well). I think a true betch wouldn’t take the time to share these things with others… or need confirmation from a website.

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  141. 16 says:

    Just as a heads up Louis XIV was the Sun King, so you’re correct in this aspect of your comparison. However, he was not “overthrown and beheaded.” That would be Louis XVI. Also, your ‘let them eat cake’ reference is particular to him and not Louis XIV.

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  142. art history betch says:

    king louis xiv wasnt beheaded (his grandson was). if your gonna talk about stuff at least get your facts straight..

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  143. sororitysista says:

    Ok sweetheart way to friggen judge! Don’t just assume all sorority girls are a dumb sluts…it’s rude and ignorant. Sorority girls are amazing, hot, well dressed girls who know where it’s at. Be jealous if you must.

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  144. katelyn says:

    we all know that one girl that tries to be a “betch” but just ends up looking like a dumbass. this site is fucking retarded.

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  145. This is stupid. says:

    If you read the comments they all sound extremely bitchy. Also everyone on this site seems to dislike each other… Apparently Betches are too dumb to make up a better fucking word then one that is closely substituent with Bitch. I would recommend you just stop. Save your own useless time.

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  146. seriously says:

    this is the dumbest website i have ever seen any girl who thinks this site is good advice or want to be a betch is just a dirty little slut that guys have no respect for and just use her as the hole she is.  you whores need a reality check start acting right

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  147. European betch says:

    Louis XIV wasn’t beheaded. he died of gangrene.

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  148. Haley says:

    like ever heard of satire? chill out.

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  149. Anonymous says:

    no he died of syphilis

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  150. Anonymous says:

    his grandson didnt rule for 58 years lmao… he was king louis 16..married to marie antionette.. she was beheaded a year after him.. both guillotined in their forties… after louis the 16th came the french revolution aka NAPOLEON BITCHES

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  151. Newport Betch says:

    I’m sups pissed. The site went from being AMAZING to ehh to awful. Seriously, it’s not even for betches anymore. It’s lacking some serious class. Head betches—who did you hire to write for you?? The personal touch that used to be evident in every post is exactly what’s been lacking. Plus, I just feel like everything on this site is far too nouveau riche/white trash. What about old money? What about being perfect? What about class? Elegance? This is not what becoming a debutante taught me. Nor private school, nor studying abroad, nor my parents. The REAL betches on this site were raised much better than this. IE, they would know… Aspen is totes overrated, go to Vail; being sick is for losers who can’t afford concierge docs; there’s NOTHING wrong with Tiffany; you would never find the perfect intern by advertising for the position on this site; Lindsay Lohan is trash (not class); and lastly, NO BETCH IN HER RIGHT FUCKING MIND WOULD EVER SUPPORT THE FUCKING OCCUPY MOVEMENT. 

    Thanks for the memories betches. Sure I’ll be checking up on you periodically for the occasional post of perfection, but don’t expect half the girls who used to read this site to continue. It’s basically turned to crap. 

    PS- anyone who fucking DARES to comment negatively to this, you’re obviously the nouveau riche class that will continue to read this ostentatiously, you tasteless b.i.t.c.h.e.s.

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  152. Aliana says:


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  153. Anonymous says:

    Bros hating on betches via a comment feed on a website dedicated to betches is more stupid than going to Taco Bell when you’re on an all-carb diet. Your collective attempt to insult betches with oh so original quips (make me a sandwich) and clever euphemisms about promiscuity (useless sperm receptacle) only reaffirm what every betch already knows. Pretentious bros are more pathetic and useless than the condoms they carry around in their wallets. You’re obvi intimidated by an empowered betch and even more jello that we’re abfab while your girlfriend is more abflab. (Seriously, tell that bitch to stop eating her feelings). What I’m getting at here is this- Don’t hate the betch… Hate yourself. Everyone else already does.

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  154. Becky says:

    oh my God, I finally found people who understand exactly what I mean. P.S. Chelsea Handler is my personal goddess, I just want to be her

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  155. Chloe says:

    Just an FYI- Although Louis XIV was the sun king, he wasn’t beheaded that was his great grandson Louis XVI

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  156. john says:

      I go to a school were betches are very common, well at least they at the most notable women here and of all the women I’ve known, they have been the greatest mystery to me because there seems to be nothing inside of their head.
      Completely vapid and I have been trying to figure out them out for a long time and than I found this site!  Thank you!

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  157. Bridget says:

    hahahahaha only poor people were leopard - I die too great betches, keep up the excellent betchy comments

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  158. ಠ_ಠ says:

    Just so you know, the people who “like” this site, are the people I make fun of every day.  I’m not the only one either.  My sloppy sweaty turds look better than the people who post here.

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  159. Confused says:

    I’m taking this as satire, which I think is what it’s supposed to be…..but I don’t know how many others are….. The description of a “betch” just seems to be a materialistic attention-whore. How glorious. And to the people saying, “I’m the #1 betch!”, it’s nothing to be proud of… all….whatsoever.. I really hope others are taking this as satire…. -___-

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  160. BRONONYMOUS says:

    APPARENTLY being a ‘betch’ means not knowing how to spell:

    “She’s never waited on line at a club or bar in her life. “

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  161. deanxoxo says:

    Can a guy be a betch or like some type of a betch? Or is it like strictly girl betches?

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  162. Belle Vierge says:

    Louis XV (the Beloved) was the great-grandson of Louis XIV, the Sun King. Louis XV ruled from September 1, 1715 til his death on May 10, 1774. Aka about 58 years. He was then succeeded by his grandson, Louis XVI, who was beheaded during the French Revolution. Both Louis XVI and Marie-Antoinette were in their late 30s when they died. Napoleon rose to power at the very end of the French Revolution, which lasted a decade.

    Try reading a book before you erroneously correct someone else.

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  163. Belle Vierge says:

    Louis XIV was succeeded by his great-grandson, Louis V, who was succeeded by his grandson, Louis XVI, who was beheaded.

    Thus, Louis XVI was the great-great-great grandson of Louis XIV.

    If YOU’RE going to talk about stuff, at least get your facts straight.

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  164. Belle Vierge says:

    Louis XVI was the grandson of Louis XV who was the great-grandson of Louis XIV.

    Apparently only those of us who doubled in History & French remember Louis XV…

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  165. rach says:

    This Site is Tha Besttt!

    Posted on Reply
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