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By The Betches on

Things I understood more than last night's ep of PLL:

- Organic Chemistry
- Obamacare
- Plot of Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

We already accepted that this whole "A" conspiracy/baby-terrorist group would never happen. Fine. But we expect that the rest of the shit to follow would be somewhat in line with its level of absurdity. But last night the episode was like regular PLL but on crack, while suffering from heat stroke…after a lobotomy. To quote T Swift, NEVER would Spencer Hastings be admitted to a juvenile detention center, like ever. If a girl is found disoriented and unresponsive in the middle of the woods, the first place she would go is the hospital. Not a psych ward or juvie, no matter how bad her hair looks that day. Especially not in a town like Rosewood where Spencer and her 3 friends are as famous as Alex Neiers and her sisters. Wait, bad example.


"A"

Is it me or does Mona have a big lesbian crush on all these girls?

Why does A always have to wear their black hoodie and gloves when she/he is alone just drivin' around? Doesn't she ever wash that thing? Gross.

This van is seriously ghetto. You know that because it has one of those Mother Mary things hanging from the rearview mirror. A should invest less money in fancy wreaths and bobble heads and more like, a Prius or something.

Hanna

 

Did Hanna just get a snapchat from A? Either way that pic was mad blurry A should use a better insta filter.

Hanna's Mom: Ugh I really wish these were pretzels.
Hanna: Just put some salt on it

Hanna is really good at #129 making shit up: "Nothing works under water, it's a scientific fact."

WILDEN's ALIVE!! And he wants his pink shirt car back.

Aria

In what world would a school re-hire a teacher who was having sex with a sixteen year old student!?

Remember when you thought your pedophile-looking dad was going to kill you?

"Maybe spencer just didn't get our SOS" Or maybe she didn't understand what SOS meant because it's not 1912  and she wasn't on the fucking Titanic.

Emily

This Missy Franklin cameo was weird. Would you rather: be a 4-time olympic gold medalist, have a cameo on PLL, or have Missy's "Rumer Willis" chin?

Why does Dr. Sullivan know Emily and all her friends' secrets? It's like, you're an adult, stop hanging out with high schoolers.

Spencer

 

What does it say about you when you go missing for a night and the first place your best friends think to look is the bookstore. Hello..LOSER.

Are there no hair brushes in the psych ward? Because she desperately needs one. That and a tanning bed.

Spencer's Saturday nights were probalby already spent playing Solitaire by herself.

Dr. Sullivan: "Spencer I know you took a lot into that forrest with you..." She's acting as if Spencer is Ralph from Lord of the Flies.

"You want tapioca or vanilla?" God Spencer being in a mental institution is no excuse to fucking eat.

Mona's desk has "will the circle be unbroken" carved on it? I guess that's better than a dicktation?

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17 Comments TALK SHIT!
  1. No says:

    Good

    Posted on Reply
  2. It's from a movie says:

    Sometimes you poke the bear, and other times the bear pokes you.

    Posted on Reply
    • BetchPlease says:

      It’s a saying. From a movie or something…

      Posted on Reply
  3. um says:

    why did you not say anything about the ending when spencer imagines the other liars in fornt over her as tears drip down her face because “you dont knwo me anymore” i feel like you leave way too much of the absurdities out of your ppl recaps.

    Posted on Reply
  4. what says:

    sub-par recap.

    Posted on Reply
  5. Sad day says:

    Disappointed there was no baby (caleb) Ezra this week… Acting coaches must not have had the patience to make him pretend falling off a couch hurt him enough for stitches.

    Posted on Reply
  6. Betchy says:

    I die at the summer heights high references. Dead (like Toby)

    Posted on Reply
  7. Your Name says:

    The writers of this show are a whole lot like Carol in Bridesmaids, they need to get their fucking shit together. Not only would Spencer not be sent to a psych ward, she wouldn’t be sent to juvie, bitch would be sent to a hospital for the multiple contusions she had. And there they would put her on psych hold, you can’t just fucking commit someone. And like the betches pointed out, no one recognizes her??? The liars are like more famous than Marilyn Monroe in Rosewood, been on every paper and talked to every cop, but the cops that pick her up have no idea who she is? Right. Get your shit together, this show is already unbelievable, but this is just getting fucking dumb

    Posted on Reply
  8. Your Name says:

    Dying at the Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy reference - legit most confusing movie ever.

    Posted on Reply
  9. Your Name says:

    loving the friends reference

    Posted on Reply
    • wait... says:

      what friends reference?

      Posted on Reply
      • The Pink Shirt says:

        is a Mean Girls reference. Not Ross’s pink shirt.

        Posted on Reply
  10. no honey, no... says:

    This is all getting out of control. Why does Hannah’s mom take (legal) advice from her daughter who is tangled up in the most giant web of bullshit on the entire main line? And why doesn’t Wilden have a limp… I don’t understand time passing in rosewood. They talk about toby being in the kitchen like it was yesterday but then the invincible wilden shows up and he has had time to recuperate from flying through the air after being nailed by a car?
    no.
    I’m done.

    Posted on Reply
  11. maddie says:

    is it just me or does spencers cry face look a lot like claire danes’ cry face

    Posted on Reply
  12. queen betch says:

    did you betches just learn what animated gifs were?

    Posted on Reply
  13. Not betchy says:

    Since when do betches drive a Prius?

    Posted on Reply
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