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By The Betches on

This week’s betch of the week is long overdue. When Usher’s "Lil Freak" came out, you were all wondering who the fuck is this bitch at the end of the song and why is she so good? Next thing you know you’re replaying it on your iPod over and over, just to terribly rap/sing along to her part. It wasn't long until you found your BSCB idol: Nicki Minaj.

Well, it’s no surprise that she’s now on the top music charts, signed with Lil Wayne’s Young Money Records, and is the baddest-betch around. Bros respect Nicki. She got 50k for one fucking verse before even having a fucking album.

Nicki’s a betch because she has her own style and doesn’t give a shit about what anyone says about it. Her image is mostly defined by her big ass hair and her even bigger ass. Now, normally coloring your hair neon is for punk losers like Avril Lavigne, but Nicki pulls it off, probably because she doesn’t pair the hairstyle with fucking rubber band bracelets and a piano key necktie.


Nicki wears shit that no one can pull off, not even Lady Gaga. She doesn’t try to make any fucking statements with her outfits, like she wouldn’t be caught dead being carried around in an egg. That shit was ridiculous. No, Nicki mixes styles of different decades. What better to go with a retro suit from the early 90s than a Victorian-do?

Nicki charged through the music business like a true betch, fighting off jealous bitches with straight class.

Yes, we’re talking about the Lil’ Kim feud. In response to being accused of stealing Kim’s persona, Nicki dismissed Kim as a “has been” and said:

"I respect you. I love you. I've said it in every interview time and time again. And if that's not good enough for you, mama, there's something deep rooted in you. ... That's your insecurity bothering you. It's not Nicki Minaj." Talk about winning.

Nicki’s a badass. She knows she’s the shit and she’s not afraid to say it. Every betch should thank her for making it possible for us to rap to a song without sounding like a dude. Like we all really loooooved Weezy’s “Lollipop” but we sounded like drugged out white girls trying to keep up with the words.

Thanks to Nicki, now we’re able to appear just marginally retarded.

Let's talk about Nicki's BCSB multiple personalities. Betch is too cool to only handle one state of mind. She states "Anybody that knows me knows that I have a very, very bipolar personality, so one minute I’m excited and the next minute I’m crying and the next minute I’m cussing and yelling and the next minute I’m singing Enya." She may come off weird to some, but that doesn’t stop you from listening to her music. In fact, it makes the betch that much more interesting!

You know Nicki's a real betch when the only thing you can really say about her is, “Shit, that bitch is so fucking cool.”

As Nicki herself says, "Been around the world, I still can't find another girl that can steal my shine. I've had my highs, I've had my lows, But you can't tell me that I am not the baddest bitch." She's reading our minds.



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22 Comments TALK SHIT!
  1. The Betches says:

    No comment about her ass? For shame, betches!

    Posted on Reply
  2. The Betches says:

    Her ass was def mentioned.

    Posted on Reply
  3. The Betches says:

    Her ass was def mentioned.

    Posted on Reply
  4. The Betches says:

    I’ve been waiting for Nicki to show up in Betch of the Week for a while. She is a crazy ass hoe and the ultimate betch.

    Posted on Reply
  5. The Betches says:

    disappointing post. The girl is def bat shit crazy but I’m not convinced that she’s a true betch. Girls don’t like her and shes kinda trashy. She was hot for ten min but now im done

    Posted on Reply
  6. The Betches says:

    agree with itskelseybetch

    Posted on Reply
  7. The Betches says:

    W0W! Nicki is one of the best! And you know she’s taking care of herself with those ass-implants. #amazing.

    Posted on Reply
  8. The Betches says:

    Kelsee (with an accent on the first e), you are so right. Nicki’s vuluptous ass is a testimony to the calories NOT needed to be fucking hot all the time. There are just some ppl that deserve the status and exude the qualities of a true betch; likewise some dont (like that fugly Gaga). I personally think that the next betch of the week should be naomi campbell (her betcheness is next to godliness). thoughts?

    Posted on Reply
  9. The Betches says:

    Mmhmm, Nicki is def up at the top. <3 that betch. However, I must say that GaGa is my absolute favourite. I mean, she changes outfits in the middle of her songs. She’s simply not one to ever be caught wearing the same thing for extended periods of time; it’s just not in style. Wearing the same outfit for more than 5 minutes is for peasants and people who play by the rules. And,! Naomi Campbell is a great pick. In addition, I would like to see Lindsay Lohan become the next BOTW. Everything about her oozes, “Step up off me, you filthy commoner.”

    Posted on Reply
  10. The Betches says:

    Kelsee (still with an accent on the first e) i think you and I just became BFBFL’s [Best Fucking Betches Forever Life]. The fact that you agree with me, the betchiest betch known to betchkind, is a reason in its self for me to give you a chance to be my best betch (notice my use of the “#32 Token Crazy Friend” — being you). <<Why u ask?? I mean lets to be totes honest here, its cool you like Gaga and all, but bitch needs to cut off her nose before she whacks one of her back-up dancers #MAJORsurgeryNOW. As a mega-betch, meaning I couldn’t give a shit about anyone else’s “feelings” if I tried, I just wanted to let you know my thoughts on that horrid beast of a musician. However on the brighter side, we should both pat ourselves on the back for collectively agreeing on Naomi Campbell (but more so me since I though of it first =).

    Posted on Reply
  11. The Betches says:

    Oh hayy, FiercestBitchAlive!! First of all, I wanted to thank you for acknowledging my “´” accent over the first “e.” It’s very important that bitches learn what’s fucking up. On another note, I’m almost flattered that you recognize me as one of your BFBFL’s. However, I must say that I don’t become people’s best friend…on the contrary, they become mine. You think I am the Token Crazy Friend? Hmm. I will wait to hear your reply before I come back swinging. Now, onto the wonderful topic that is Lady GaGod. Betch is a betch. We’ve already covered that. She is constantly changing outfits and has openly admitted to not giving a shit. And yes, she has hit her backup dancer before. But that’s to just remind her who is in charge, yo. Paws up.

    Posted on Reply
  12. The Betches says:

    Np Kelsee (yet again and probably forever an accent on the first e)…its pioneer betches such as myself that make it possible for up-and-coming betches like you to have meaning in life. And honey don’t mention the BFBFL invite; it was no big deal.Besides, you would have been a fucking retard to have not accepted it. Anyone who supports that down syndrome-looking gargoyle (AKA your beloved GaGa), is literally screaming for friendship….or just an ultra mega-hip star betch to guide you through life;by the way you can totes be the third wheel to me and my other betches friendship if you’d like?? =)

    Babe, dont take the # 32 Token Crazy Friend thing the wrong way…its def a comp (bc im not sure if your fucking retarded or not, comp = compliment). The fact that I even labeled you is an honor; consider yourself officially of substance to society (smooch).

    In this third section I will explain my reasoning behind why Quasimodo (aka GaGa) is an awful choice for inspiration:

    1) Her nose could fucking land a Boeing 747 on it.
    2) Bitch( not betch…hasnt qualififed for the position) is totes schizo with her attire…that shit is not ground-breaking…nor cute.
    3) My aunt’s un-born fetus can sing better than her…

    Those are just a few of my reasons for not liking Butchy.. I mean…”Lady” Gaga. If you want to idolize someone, pick a human that has attractive physical features( since that is what all REAL betches care about). Such as:

    1) Vickie Becks; so close to being ano w/o being ano…so betchy…
    2) Naomi Campbell ; tears up a runway and reeks of the motto “I’ll stomp all over a bitch in my way…”
    3) Regina George (Rachel McAdams); even though she is fictional, this betch RE-DEFINED the up-bringing and teachings for young betches-in-training everywhere.

    So in conclusion….PICK A NEW IDOL!!! until then….your……a……wanna be…..betch.

    <3 ya.

    Posted on Reply
    • shut up says:

      do you think you’re cool omg you sound sf annoying

      Posted on Reply
  13. The Betches says:

    Everyone loves to talk shit on Nicki, which always happen to our inner betch. Nicki can show up on the Grammy red carpet in a leopard suit and multi-color hair and rock that baby like a wagon wheel! She has the largest behind in the world but is also extremely talented and came from literally nothing and is now topping the charts. So excuse a betch if she wants to work what she has earned and maybe make some other betches jealous. All if fair in love and booty shaking.

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  14. The Betches says:

    Nicki is a fucking Queen Betch and don’t even try to argue that.

    Posted on Reply
  15. Sarah says:


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  16. betch says:

    Fav quote:

    “yo, now all these bitches wanna try and be my bestie
    But I take a left and leave them hanging like a testi
    Trash talk to em then I put em in a hefty”

    Ultimate betchs dont branch out.

    Posted on Reply
  17. Anonymous says:

    No….nicki minaj is not a fucking betch. She is ghetto and fat. Plus the fact that you think she would dress ANYTHING like this if lady gaga hadnt been around first is actually laughable…try opening a magazine once every 2 years and maybe you would know. Gaga is the true betch, Chanel casually makes her custom outifts for her BARNEYS opening where they felt like giving her an entire store for christmas.

    Posted on Reply
  18. Betchy McBetcherson says:

    Loved the post, Nicki is a bad betch. That being said…I read the comments section because after laughing so hard at what other ‘betches’ have to say, I’ve basically completed my ab routine at the gym…but the love fest between ‘Kels fucking accented bullshit’ and ‘fiercest betch alive’ actually made me vom, so I guess the lose cals goal was still achieved….it’s like, whatever, but they should really just get a private chat.  Laughing at the comments > made nauseated by the comments

    Posted on Reply
  19. Keepin It Real Betch says:

    Normally I wouldn’t take time out of my busy schedule to handle wanna be betches like yourself but since you obvi are a nice girl at heart (vom!) and I feel sorry for you, I am going to go ahead and point out the obvious : you are trying way to hard to be a betch. Betches don’t have to try, that’s what makes us betchy. Better luck next year nice girl. Smooches!

    Posted on Reply
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