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By The Betches on

Hey betches,

So we've been getting a ton of requests to add a music feature to our site, and we totally feel you on that. We were similarly disappointed that our own site, which we rely upon to tell us exactly how to live our lives, didn't even remember to tell us what songs to like. But since we have too much ADD to keep up with music thoroughly enough to blog about it, we resorted to what we usually do, which is get someone else to do it for us.

We got the resident biddy from to blog for us under her pseudonym ATexas (No she doesn't live in Texas we asked) and be our very own resident music betch. She'll be posting short playlists of the latest shit for you to pregame, party, workout, have sex, do whatever to, which you can download courtesy of Fresh New Tracks.

And with that, a word from ATexas...


Everyone these days can be that apathetic betch in the Missoni caftan, drinking Goose from an antique flask, dancing on the table to whatever the fuck music is on. Please Lana Del Rey, we've seen it before.

But some of you want to be the betch who controls the vibe of the party...You might say, “but I have an amazinggg playlist!” Well, if you think that Avicii and Sebastian Ingrosso are the epitome of what’s hot, then you need to rewind. Don’t worry, I understand that your possible lack of music is due to your busy schedule of not giving a fuck.

But if you regularly wake up with an unusual amount of European friend requests, asphyxiate on the chicness of anything by The Row and sometimes contemplate having ombre hair, then you too can be the DJ Betch of your bestie group. So here's some songs, listen or don't. Just remember the more fucking weird Swedish the name of the DJ the better!

Here's the breakdown of our first set:

fell in love on dance floorBei Maejor - Fell In Love on the Dancefloor

1. Five (Mylo, Freesol feat. Justin Timberlake & Calvin Harris vs. Archie V) - if you're only going to download one song from this playlist, it's this one. It makes you want to run 10 miles or like, drink into oblivion. I mean it should say something when you have like 4 favorite parts in one song.

2. Walking Alone (Fluxus Remix) - Just a great house track. Doesn't really pick up until 1:08 / 1:56, but when it gets there you like want to get up and jump on top of shit.

3. Keep Me Waiting - We hold Cinema close to our hearts so this one hits home. We also love Flo Rida's new song Wild Ones and that's in there too. So if you also stay(ed) up all night in college doing retarded shit/drugs to Cinema, you'll like it, it's sweet.

4. Grape Vine (Original Mix) - A throwback song about talking shit mixed with a house beat, enough said. Perf for a blunt session / casual shot taking (because who doesn't do that…)

5. Fell in Love on the Dancefloor (Bei Maejor) - Much less house, but still so sick. Great for a pregame.

Now go black out, it's fucking Wednesday.

Stay betchy,

ATexas, Fresh New Tracks, and The Betches

And if you want to listen to the playlist straight through here it is:

36 Comments TALK SHIT!
  1. Anonymous says:


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  2. Alexandra says:

    I love! I’m also really into Florence + The Machine’s Shake It Out (Benny Benassi Remix), Morgan Page’s In The Air (feat. Angela McCluskey, Sultan + Ned Shepard, BT), and pretty much anything on Nero’s album Welcome Reality - especially Promises.

    Posted on Reply
  3. Chase says:

    Great tracks, keep them coming I desperately need more tunes like this!

    Posted on Reply
  4. Carolyn says:

    like, SO good

    Posted on Reply
  5. RC says:


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  6. MissM says:

    Took the words out of my mouth.

    Posted on Reply
  7. Kristi says:

    Love love love these! Perf for the gym later and now I’m excited for the weekend!

    Posted on Reply
  8. Pretty Little Betch says:

    Amazing!!! Good job head betches. If any other betches have songs they recommend feel free to comment below this…

    Posted on Reply
  9. Anonymous says:

    so proud i had 3/5

    Posted on Reply
  10. weaksauce says:

    You are saying Avicci is played out (and he is) but then you have a “Feel So Close” mash-up as your # 1 track?! Might as well through “Love In A Hopeless Place” and Adele in here while you’re at it

    Posted on Reply
  11. shelbetch says:

    Gotta say, this is the betchiest idea ever. I’ve grown weary and tired of that place is trying too hard.

    Posted on Reply
  12. brill says:

    this is brill.

    Posted on Reply
  13. hawt betch says:

    these songs are ass

    Posted on Reply
  14. Anonymous says:

    Obviously he isn’t overplayed if you can’t even spell his name properly…Also, rarely have I encountered someone who can properly make the your/you’re differentiation but confuses throw and through. Bravo

    Posted on Reply
  15. ummm says:

    Wait… so like, you’re hating on the betches with that embarrassing grammar?? sorry but i think you meant “throw.” Also betches love avicii and adele. Get with it. Now “go black out.”

    Posted on Reply
  16. ooooo says:

    it’s kind of refreshing reading shit written in a different narrative voice. make a fashion betchhhhhhhh

    Posted on Reply
  17. GETmoneyGETpaid says:

    This saved me so much time. I hate wasting hours trying to find heady new songs to rage to. This is just one more reason to read Betches.

    Posted on Reply
  18. ehh says:

    so all we betches listen to are half-ass mashups now? come correct with some original shiz next time and i’ll be into

    Posted on Reply
  19. Anonymous says:

    Truly superb lineup! love it

    Posted on Reply
  20. megan says:


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  21. Anonymous says:

    Just what I need right now! Perf

    Posted on Reply
  22. Anonymous says:

    amaze! keep this as a weekly thing, love it

    Posted on Reply
  23. Anon says:

    These tracks are perfect for playing while #56 cutting lines

    Posted on Reply
  24. Anonymous says:

    agreed. this shit sucks. since when is this trash considered music?

    Posted on Reply
  25. Vegas Betch says:

    Well fucking played, betches.

    Posted on Reply
  26. 2charliespls says:

    maybe send your slaves to europe before having them promote songs we ve been abusing for months. other than that, educate those americans

    Posted on Reply
  27. dankybetch says:

    lame choices, the majority of them just suck #disappointed

    Posted on Reply
  28. Sammy says:

    love freshnewtracks…

    Posted on Reply
  29. Electrogirl says:

    A true betch doesnt need to listen to mashups of mashups. Also if I wanted to find new beats to party to, I’d go straight to freshnewtracks or beatport. This is lame.

    Posted on Reply
  30. Anonymous says:

    Thanks betches now I can finally add more awesome songs to our PG list for date party tomorrow!

    Posted on Reply
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